Grenerella : The Musical
by The Freaky Humor
Summary: This crazy Cinderella-gone-wrong story will leave you in stitches by the end! That crazy sick perverted humor is back! But this time its gone BROADWAY! Come read a touchingly weird story about love, hate and a couple's fate!
1. Prologue

Disclaimer: I don't own Bebop... Or Cinderella.. Okay... Now read on...  
  
Grenerella  
  
Author's note: This is an extremely messed up story of the classic tale "Cinderella." You all may hate me after reading this.. But hey.. I was inspired by a freind to write this so blame her!! (LOL! Just kidding Kendra!) Well anyway this story has a slight musical twist.. And remember I'm not Roger Hammerstein or whatever so the songs maay be really bad... But they are just there for humor... So Enjoy!! The characters are as follows:  
  
Vicious: Faerie Godmother Jet: King Ein: Queen Spike: Prince Gren: Cinderella Annie Evil Step-mother Julia: Evil step-sister Faye: Not so evil step-sister Ed: Prince Spike's teacher The two kids from Annie's Shop (you know the one's stealin porn?): Yeah they are the "two kids" any part with kids in it that's them!  
  
Well there you have it!!! And Now May I Present to you.. Mayonaka Hoshi's: Grenerella  
  
P.S. Please read my other fics!! 


	2. Grenerella

"Grenerella!!" Annie cried exasperatedly as she tapped her foor impaitently  
for the young girl to come down. "GRENERELLA!!!???" She bellowed again  
looking up and listening for footsteps to descend the stairs. A moment  
later the loud scuffling was heard.  
  
"Yes Stepmother?"  
  
"Grenerella?! Where have you been? I had to call you twice that time!!"  
  
"I was cleaning the stables.." Came the meek reply.  
  
"Oh, I though something smelled like shit around here! Now get your dick up  
there and clean the chimmeny."  
  
"Yes stepmother-fucker"  
  
"What did you just say?!"  
  
"I said Yes Step Mother.." She repeated as she watched the fat hog go up  
the stairs. "Fucker." Grenerella mumbled as she grabbed the ladder and  
headed outside to the bright sunny day. She smiled as she saw two boys  
playing. "Hello you two!" Grenerella called pausing as she realized that  
they weren't playing with each other but looking at porn and well... You  
get the picture..  
  
"Hey lady!" One called as he jumped up and ran over to the young woman.  
"Watch this!" A swify kick to the balls brought Grenerella to her knees,  
eyes widening in pain. "HA! HA! You DO have balls!! See Tom!! I told tou  
she had 'em!! I get your mag now!!" The boy swiftly ran over to his freind  
to retreive his "precious" new item. Grenerella watched him hatefully as  
the two boys left.  
  
"I go through this everyday.. Same thing.. Different kids.. Wish they'd  
leave me alone.."  
  
*Music plays*  
  
OH I'm just a poor girl Living in a poor world.  
Well I'm not really a girl and My life sucks.  
  
My step-sister Julia gave me pills to see If some boobs  
would grow on me  
Now I wear a double D  
Why'd she hafta do this to me?!  
  
Ohhh I'm a guy with boobs heir bigger than most dudes  
How I wish I had some moobs So I could be...  
What I used to be... AAAA GGGGGGUUUUUYYYYY!!!!  
  
"Grenerella! Stop that ridiculous racket and clean the chiminey!!  
NNNOOOWW!!!"  
  
"Yes Stepmother-fucker! Grenerella mumbled as she stopped the music and  
headed up the ladder to do her most hated job. She looked around to her  
surprise found everyone in a half mile raoius for her villiage gaping in  
disblief at this new knowledge. She blushed and hoped that everyone would  
forget the little jingle and return to their one gendered lives. 


	3. All Hail Prince Spike

Spike sat there with his teacher Edward Wong Hau Peplu Trivusky the IV who  
was diligently teaching him the ways of the computer. Spike, totally  
uninterested puffed on his cigarette comtemplating life.  
  
"Spike-person!? Are you listening to Ed?!"  
  
"Yeah I am!" He retorted  
  
"Then what did Ed say?"  
  
" You said to take Ed's head and shove it through your dumb-ass  
computer!!!" (A/N: READ SCREAM Z!)  
  
"Ed did not say that!! Ed say-  
  
The girl was interrupted by a loud knocking on the door.  
  
"Come in!" Spike yelled dreading who in this life he hated could possibly  
be on the other end of the slab of painted wood.  
  
"Spike-o!!" King Jet yelled as he ran into the room "Come meet your new  
brother!"  
  
"HOLY S-  
  
"Watch Your Mouth!!" Jet reprimanded as he forced his son out the door and  
drug him to the royal sitting room.  
  
"Your mother-  
  
"HE'S NOT MY MOTHER!! Spike screamed as he pulled his arm away from Jet's.  
"That thing will never ever take place of mom!!"  
  
The king blinked at the sudden outburst but decided to ignore it and  
continue with his story. "Ahem.. Well Ein and I were at the mall and we saw  
the cutest little thing in a shop and decided that it was about time you  
had a brother!" Jet pulled back the blanket to reveal...  
  
"A Log?"  
  
"No!!!" Jet cried "It's a Bonsai tree!!" His name is Bonny!" (A/N: READ  
BIRDS, BEES, AND BONSAI TREES!!)  
  
"Look Spike! His hair resembles yours!" Jet said indicating to the plant's  
wirly leaves. "Now say hello to Bonny!"  
  
Ein barked proudly at the new addition to the royal family.  
  
"I'm not going to talk to a Fu-  
  
"I SAID WATCH YOUR MOUTH!!" Jet yelled "Dammit Spike! Where the hell did  
you learn such dirty-ass language? Now say hello to Bonny!!"  
  
A silence occurred in the room one that never was or never will be heard  
again. A small whimper and a bark was heard as Ein tried to communicate  
with his husband.  
  
"Your mother says that if you don't say hello that He'll go into your room  
and shit on your shoes!"  
  
Spike glared at the corgie, swallowed his cigarette and began to cough  
violently.  
  
"Spike!! I told you not to do that in public!! GROSS!!"  
  
Spike stopped and walked over to the tree and spit a salvia doused  
cigarette onto the pitiful plant then darted to his room laughing as he  
threw Edward out, then shutting and locking his door so a certain mutt  
couldn't put a hot steamy surprise in his favorite shoes.  
  
'Why'd Mom hafta die??' Spike thought as soft music began to play:  
  
Things were going pretty good  
Just as I thought they would  
But now I would change them If I could!  
  
*Music gets a little Jazzy*  
  
Well my mother died one lonely day  
Messing things up in every way.  
Well my Dad married my dog  
Now Ein is my new mom  
And my brother is a lllooogggg......  
  
*Music stops and Spike exhales loudly*  
  
"Or is he just a tree?!" 


	4. The Invitation

"Oh my!! Oh my!" Julia exclaimed as she opened a very important  
announcement from the king. "The prince is hosting a ball and we are  
invited!!" Faye squealed and the two girls began to happily prance around  
the room.(A/N: I know that was extremely OOC but you try writing a musical  
off the top of your head this time of night.)  
  
"Oh this is great!!" Annie exclaimed as she watched the two dance. "One of  
you will marry the Prince and give lots of mon-er I mean grandchildren!!"  
"OH! That horrid smell!! What is it?!" Faye questioned as she daintily put  
a kerchief over her nose. "It smelly entirely of shit!"  
  
Annie gasped as she turned to see Grenerella standing there. "Grenerella!  
Haven't you showered yet?!"  
  
"Yes about twenty times.. But the smell won't leave me."  
  
"Well it's a good thing you're not going to the ball!"  
  
"I'm not?!"  
  
"Of course not!" Julia put in. "You have too many balls to be seen there!  
You can make my wedding dress when Price Spike and I are wed!"  
  
"What? Are you delirious?! You're not marrying Spike! I am!! Faye announced  
as music played and she began to sing.  
  
"I shall be the one The one to fufill his dreams  
The one you'll never be Because you're too hairy!"  
  
Julia scowled evily and began her line.  
  
"Of course I'll be the one He'll one to when he leaves you!  
I will be the one he'll ask to marry don't you see?!  
He won't marry you because you don't know what pleases."  
  
Faye began to cry, withdrawing her gun and shooting it a few times in the  
air mumbling something about "pleasing" and "Julia's a dirty whore." Until  
the room was silenced by an awful yell.  
  
"Girls!! Stop this nonsense!!" Annie wailed "we need to go shopping for  
some new dresses!! Boy!! Or whatever you are!! Go clean the gutters!!"  
  
"Yes mother!" All three chorused as they set off to do whatever they were  
going to do. "Oh I wish I could go..." Grenerella sighed as she watched the  
three take off. 


	5. The Vicious Faerie

Grenerella sighed as she threw the last clump of leaves on the ground and  
went inside or her 21st shower that day. As she exited the bathroom her  
step-mother and step-sisters were leaving to go to the ball.  
  
"Have fun sitting at home while we're having the time of our lives!!" Julia  
exclaimed as she strode by in her flowing gown  
  
"Does this bussel make my butt look big?!" Faye questioned as she tried to  
turn to look at the back of her dress.  
  
"Of course not dear." Annie said as she came down the stairs in a dress  
herself. But of course she looked like nothing more than a fat hog stuffed  
inside of a hideous dress.(A/N: Boy... Is she gonna get a lot of dances  
tonight!)  
  
"Wow Step-mother! You look great!!" (A/N: Suck up!)Grenerella exclaimed  
articially as the three proceeded to leave the house. Annie nodded, her  
many chins wiggling in agreement. "Good thing you're not going to the ball.  
Disgrace to the family you are." (A/N: Why does that sound like Kenshin or  
Yoda to me?!)  
  
With that she slammed the door leaving a sobbing Grenerella on her knees.  
  
"If only I had a Faerie Godmother!"  
  
A chime was heard and a beautiful faerie descended from the sky, his silver  
hair blowing in the sofy breeze, his piercing brown eyes glistening as he  
looked down and smiled at the young bi-gender. (A/N: Anyone else realize  
how screwed up this story really is?) The faerie broke out into song:  
  
Grenerella, Grenerella You have boobs though you're a fella.  
  
You gave me a call So now you're going to the ball!  
  
Grenerella, Grenerella You smell like shit Lemme tell ya!  
But if you just give me a chance I can try to get rid of that! Oh-  
  
"WHO ARE YOU?!" Grenerella asked intruptting the faerie's humorous song. "I  
am Vicious.. Your faerie Godmother!" Came the reply. "I am here to help you  
get redy for the ball.. WEREN'T YOU LISTENING TO MY SONG YOU DUMB-ASS?"  
  
"Oh.. I-I'm sorry.. Your song.. It offended me deeply so I was tuning it  
out. What type of name is Vicious for a faerie anyway?!"  
  
"You'll find out in time..." Grinned the godmother. "Now.. If you want to  
got o the ball get your balls over here and bring me a pumpkin, 4  
cockroaches, 2 boys, and a porn magazine."  
  
"Yes Faerie Godmother!!" She repiled with a bow and took of to find the odd  
objects.  
****  
  
"Hey!! What the hell?! Let us go you creep!" Came the distant voice of two  
boys, 4 cockroaches, a pumpkin and a porn mag being brought to the faerie.  
  
"'Bout time!" Vicious stated as he watched the group come closer. "Now..  
set them in front of me!" Grenerella nodded and quickly placed the items in  
front of him.  
  
"Ummm.. Vicious.. Do you ever wonder why they call cockroaches roaches for  
short intead of cocks?"  
  
"Ummmm NO!!!! What was the point of that question?!"  
  
"I dunno.. I think the author is bored.." (A/N: ZZZZZZZZZ.....(-_- ))  
  
"Whatever.. Now... What was that stupid rhyme again.." Vicious thought as  
he racked his brain for the answer. "Oh well! I'll just make it up!!  
  
"Bibidi Babidi Booze! Give me some glass shoes!!"  
  
"What the hell was that?!" Gren asked but was surprised as glass slipper  
appeared on her feet and a beautiful white gown appeared over her rags.  
  
"..... It's white..."  
  
"Oh! Don't worry hunny! The artist messes up and your dress turns blue  
later on!" Vicious said matter-of-factly. (A/N: Did you ever notice that in  
Disney's Cinderella?)  
  
Grenerella turned to see the a beautiful carrage and two handsome coachmen.  
The cockroaches were.. Well... No one is gonna notice four giant  
cockroaches pulling a carraige.. Right?  
  
"Welp! that's about it!" Vicious exclaimed as he picked up the porn  
magazine and began to look at it.  
  
"Hey!! Aren't you gonna like turn the magazine into some purfume or  
something so i don't smell like shit?!"  
  
Vicious sighed dreamily as he fingered the pages. "Nope, this magazine is  
sweet enough already... The mag was just reward for all my hard work.. If  
you really want to smell good.. Go put on some Secret or Old Spice..."  
  
Grenerella growled as she stepped into her carrage and took off. But not  
before she waved goodbye to her favorite faerie with her middle finger  
extended. 


	6. The Esscence Of Crap

Grenerella smiled as she stepped out of her cockroach infested coach and  
made her way daintly down the plush red carpet into the beautiful palace.  
  
"Dammit." Spike thought as he watched the crowd of dancing couples waltzing  
around the room. 'Why do I have to be here.. All these girls are ugly  
except for....' His eye caught the beautiful girl descending the stairs.  
Which unbeknownst to him was really a guy.  
  
'There are soo many hot guys here!' Grenerella thought as she glanced  
around the room. 'Bonerific!' A rich deep voice stooped her track of  
thoughts as it echoed behind her.  
  
"May I have this dance?"  
  
'It's Prince Spike!!! He wants to dance with me!!!'  
  
As the two waltzed gracefully around the room, Spike stared at her. He  
wrinkled his nose in disgust. 'Aw man.. something really smells like crap  
around here...' He sweat dropped hoping that Ein's threat didn't exist in  
his shoe right now.  
  
"Ummm... Let's go outside shall we?" Spike asked hoping that the night air  
would cover up the mistake in his royal shoes.  
  
As the couple sat outside admiring the stars....  
  
"WHAT THE HELL?!" Spike screamed as he gazed down at a familiar carriage.  
"Look! That carriage has giant monster cocks pulling it!!"  
  
"WHAT?!" Grenerella asked looking down. "Spike those are CockROACHES..  
There's a difference.."  
  
"Oh... But still!! I thought having a dog for a mom and a log for a brother  
was wierd!"  
  
Grenerella gasped as she saw her carriage and coachmen and roaches  
dissapear and 2 boys, a pumpkin and 4 roaches standing in its place. "I--  
Uh.. I hafta go!!" She exclaimed, rushing away as she felt her dress  
getting shorter and shorter. She left a glass slipper behind.  
  
***  
  
Spike bent down and picked up the slipper. "Man! this thing is huge! This  
girl's sure got some feet! Wonder if that's a good thing... Well hell! She  
shouldn't be too hard to find..."  
*Soft Music Plays*  
  
I will find you My love  
please come let me take you..  
and give you.. aaa bbaatthh...  
  
"Yep!" Spike nodded "That smell was definitely coming from her.. 


	7. Ende Gut Alle Gut

"You faerie bitch!!" Exclaimed Grenerella as she stormed into the house in rags, the kids closley on her tail."WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME THE SPELL WASN'T PERMANENT?!"  
  
"You didn't ask.." Yawned Vicious as he looked at her with disgust. "The deal was that when I ran out of porn pleasure you ran out of dancing pleasure."  
  
"You never told me-  
  
"Chill Man.. That's why they call me Vicious.."  
  
"Oh Shut up! You don't even know what vicious means!" Grenerella said angirly. He scowled and rose getting ready to leave but a sharp pain in his lower regions stopped him as he fell to his knees staring face to face with two boys with devilish smirks.  
  
"That's what you get for taking our porn mag you jerk!!" Vicious growled and dissapeared leaving Grenerella with the two boys. Grenerella yelled in pain as she too hit the floor experiencing the same pain Vicious just had. "Okay.. You're right.. She does have balls.. You can keep the mag.." One boy said dissapointedly as they two boys walked away.  
  
Grenerella cried knowing that she would never find true love again.When suddenly the door screeched open as the two step sisters and their obese mother stormed in.  
  
"You're still crying?!" Julia asked laughing. "You mean you have been lying on the floor for five whole hours like that?! What a baby!!"  
  
***********  
  
"Did you see her Dad? She was beautiful!!!" Spike remarked waiting for his father's reply. "Huh? Oh no son.. I was off doing..... something.... In my room.." Spike looked at him with disgust. "Well she has one heckuva foot so... I'm going to go find her!! See ya!" He exclaimed as he picked up the slipper and left.  
************  
  
"And don't forget to clean the toilet!!" Annie yelled  
  
*Knock* Knock*  
  
Annie rushed to the door,opened it and screamed in the caller's face. "WE DON'T WANT ANY!!" "But ma'am!!" Spike reasoned holdomg up the slipper. "I've come to see if the shoe fits any of the young women that live here so I can take her off to my castle where we can get laid!!"  
  
"Well then.. Come right in!"  
  
"Faye??? Julia?? GET YOUR ASSES DOWN HERE!!! The prince is here!"  
  
Julia and Grenerella came bounding down the stairs. "Grenerella! I didn't call you!! Where is Faye!!??"  
  
"I don't know.. I'm sure she'll be here soon."  
  
"If she doesn't.. Who cares?!" Julia added in.  
  
"Miss would you please take a seat?" Spike asked as he himself took one. Julia nodded and removed her shoe. Spike leaned over and slipped it on.  
  
"It's too big."  
  
"What is this?! Some sort of sick joke?! Only a clown's foot would fit in that shoe!!" Julia said angirly.  
  
"May I try it on?" Grenerella pressed hopefully/  
  
Spike nodded and put the shoe on the foot.  
  
"It..... uuuhhh.. It a fits.." The whole room was silent until a heavenly voice from above broke in."  
  
"You don't want to marry Grenerella.. She's really a guy.. What you want is a real women... ME!"  
  
Spike looked up to see a beautiful angel come down the stairs. The violet haired beauty stopped at the landing her rosy lips curved in a small smile. "Hello Prince Spike my name is Faye.."  
  
"FFFAAAAYYYYEEEE..." Spike repeated slowly as if he were some retard. "Why that name must have come from heaven's sweet cream.." Faye grinned as he took her hand.  
  
"Let us be laid-er wed!" Spike announced looking into her emerald eyes.  
  
"But!!" Grenerella cried "I was the one you supossed to screw-er wed!! My foot fit the slipper!!"  
  
Spike strode angirly over to the she-man's foot and yanked the slipper off throwing to the floor and shattering it's very being.  
  
"Do you think a care?! I met my love!! At least she won't lie to me and say she's a man!! You!!! YOU!! HE-SHE!!!"  
  
Tears filled Grenerella's eyes as she watched the two prance off into the sunset.. Realizing she was neither man or woman but..... AN IT!!!!  
  
__________ *** Grenerella soon becomes famous after she was "discovered." She apperared in the hit movie "IT" (Yes she was the clown) She also appeared in Cowboy bebop. Until she was shot in the next chapter. __________  
  
A/N: Ende gut Alle Gut means "all's well that end's well" in german.. I figured if I included it in my fic maybe it will help me remember waht it means on my next german test.... Well anyway.. soo this fic ended well... After all it was the only chapter that didn't break out in song!! Well REVIEW!! 


	8. The Letter

A/N: This letter was written 3 months after Faye and Prince Spike were wed.  
  
"Hmmmmm a letter from the whore.." Julia muttered as she opened the letter  
to read its contents.  
  
Dear Julia,  
  
How has your life been? I HOPE IT SUCKS!!! Because mine is great!  
I'm sorry you were too ugly and way too hairy to marry the prince..  
But you gotta admit, the best bitch won! I sent some money so you could  
buy a razor or Nair.. Look on the bright side You can always "Partner up"  
with someone after you had a good shave! Oh and by the way..  
You were wrong about me not knowing what pleases.. Spike tells me  
every night after we-  
  
"AAAGGGGHHHHRRRRRR!!!!" Julia screamed too fustrated and  
disgusted to read more. Suddenly a great idea popped into her head.  
She knew how she was gonna relieve all that anger it was by-  
  
"OOOHHH GRENERELLA??!!!" Julia shouted cocking her gun and striding outside  
to search for the young he-she. With her extremely large nose she was able  
to pick up the She-man's  
scent. She headed toward the barn where Grenerella was faithfully cleaning  
the stalls.  
She got in position and aimed and slowly pulled the trigger.. 


End file.
